(in appropriate voices)
Late Night: December 24th, 2013: Washington D.C. The Oval Office: The White House

White House Chief of Staff John McCain briefing the President:
John McCain: I know it’s late and I’m sorry to interrupt your watching reruns of Dancing With the Stars. Our men at NORAD have confirmed a bogey flying south across the North Slope on a track heading toward the Aleutians then to Guam. I must emphasize, Madam President that we don’t know the intentions of this unidentified object or whether it is a potential threat.
President Palin: Thank you John. As you know, we can’t take any chances with possible unfriendlies. It’s possible this was a diversionary tactic from inside the Soviet Union with the intent of a surprise nukyular attack on America from Cuba.
John McCain: Russia! It’s now called Russia, Madam President.
President Palin: Since when did they change the name?
John McCain: It happened in the early 90s, Madam President.
President Palin: Why wasn’t I informed?
John McCain: It was in all the papers and on the news, Madam President. But of course that was before you became president.
President Palin: Is Russia part of the Old Soviet Union?
John McCain: (sigh) After the Berlin Wall fell, the Old Soviet Union ceased to exist and they unified into what is now present day Russia.
President Palin: Then that’s why I said that I could see Russia from my porch. Frank. See that explanation gets into our media so they understand I stay well informed. (Press Secretary Frank Luntz nearly trips over himself getting to a phone to have Roger Ailes set the story for National Fox News). Well, do we have any intel that it could be the Sovi—er, Russians?
John McCain: No, Madam President. All we know is an unidentified object is speeding south toward the Pacific.
President Palin: Well, that’s a frightening thought. Something like that could scare our Asian Allies and jeopardize the wonderful trade agreements President Obama set in motion. This could have a really bad effect on business!
John McCain: Madam President. I’ve already consulted with the CEOs of the corporations involved and may I tell you, they ARE concerned. This could affect their profits for days to come!
President Palin: Has there been any new information?
John McCain: Vice President Beck has just informed us that the object has passed over Japan and is heading for Australia via Southeast Asia.
President Palin: This is too serious. I think we need to go to Depcon 9.
John McCain: Madam President, it’s DEF-CON and they only go from 1 to 5.
President Palin: Gotcha. I knew that. I was just testing you. Who do you think you are, Katie Couric?
John McCain: No, Madam President.
President Palin: Well, we can’t have this…this intruder cause havoc to our business allies. Is our National Guard ready?
John McCain: For what, Madam President?
President Palin: To go into action to stop this obvious Rooski threat!
John McCain: We don’t know if it’s the Rooskis…er Russians, Madam President. No, the National Guard doesn’t handle this sort of thing. Besides, most of the Guard is still in Afghanistan, Yemen and South America following your orders.
President Palin: They would have when I was governor. Well, we can’t take a chance. Do we have any boats in the area that can intercept that thing?
John McCain: Ships, Madam President. We have the Pacific Fleet there as always and they are ready.
President Palin: That’s…good? Can you have the Yorktown or Lexington move into position? See? I can too speak about things I know.
John McCain: Madam President. The Yorktown and Lexington are no longer with us.
President Palin: What? Did that peace-nik Clinton decommission them?
John McCain: Madam President. The Yorktown and Lexington were sunk during World War II.
President Palin: I suppose that was in all the papers, too?
John McCain: Yes Madam President. Again, that was before your time. Probably why you don’t recall.
President Palin: Ok, then. So do we have anything newer that could handle this situation?
John McCain: I’m almost certain we have newer equipment to handle almost anything.
President Palin: Well, Ok then. It’s time for major decision making. That’s what American Business elected me for. Have this bogey brought down at all costs.
John McCain: Madam President, isn’t that a little drastic? We still don’t know its intentions. It could be a Sov- er, Russian aircraft with communication problems. We also…
President Palin: Don’t dally, Johnny Boy. We can’t take a chance on something this dangerous threatening this great nation. And after all, we ARE the only ones who care enough to protect the world.
John McCain: But Madam President…
President Palin: Not another word! I want this threat removed immediately. Shoot it down…NOW!
John McCain: (Sigh) Yes Madam President.
John leaves the Oval office and phones the Joint Chief of Staff:
John McCain: Rush, The President wants this unidentified thing shot down immediately.
Joint Chief of Staff Limbaugh: You got it.
Twenty minutes later, back in the Oval Office:
John McCain: Madam President, I’ve been informed that the unidentified object has been destroyed but…
President Palin: Great work John. See to it that everyone gets a bonus for this. Yep. You betcha. No one screws around and threatens good ol’ U.S. of A. business ventures and gets away with it.
John McCain: Madam President. The USS Nimitz found the wreckage scattered over a wide area of the Pacific and…
President Palin: Good! Is any of it identifiable?
John McCain: Madam President. I have the unfortunate duty to inform you that you just shot down Santa Claus! Toys and games destined for good little boys and girls all over the world are now heading to the bottom of the Pacific.
President Palin: (Stunned disbelief) You mean to tell me that there really is a Santa Claus? You mean the First Dude and I have been spending our own money to buy stuff for our own kids all these years? And it’s not a liberal conspiracy?
John McCain: Madam President. I mean to tell you there WAS a Santa Claus until you had him shot down and all the toys and gifts for everyone are now…gone.
An agonizing cry emanates from the couch in the oval office. Vice President Beck sits up and cries out,” What happened to the Gold Santa was bringing me?” and promptly faints.
President Palin slumps in her chair, head in hands, “My God. What have I done?”, she cries. "I understand a couple of Wolves from helicopters and maybe a Moose or two or even a Bear…but SANTA?"
John McCain:It’s ok Madam President. We’ll just claim it was a socialist plot by a gay man who lives and works with lots of small men year round to undermine the American Business System. They’ll believe that.
President Palin: Thank you John. I don’t, I don’t know what I’d do without you.

As John McCain leaves the Oval Office he mutters to himself, ”I should have voted for Obama!”

I’m not sure whether people are so misinformed, uninformed or just plain stupid about climate change. At a store over the weekend, I had the opportunity to overhear an exchange concerning climate change, or as they so archaic and eloquently and idiotically called it, “global warming” (a phrase used totally incorrectly by the morons who deliver you news by TV, radio and print).

These two were proud, self-proclaimed examples of the typical Fox News watcher. They were discussing the “hoax” of “global warming” and how it was a ploy to kill jobs and increase taxes. I couldn’t help myself, it was just too enticing. I asked them how they knew all this and wasn’t surprised when they told me that Beck and Gibson “learned them” all about it. So I asked what the facts were. They told me that hundreds (according to Beck) of scientists disputed global warming. When I asked them to name any one, they said that they couldn’t remember the names (because NONE was ever named by Beck) but had no trouble recalling the 20 minutes Beck ranted about it. I asked them how it would kill jobs. They told me that America would have to shut down electric companies because of the pollution requirements and that would cost jobs. I did ask if the companies polluted, wouldn’t it be better if we could stop the pollution and have the companies still produce electricity using cleaner methods? This caused some confusion.

They then told me that all I needed to see the proof of the hoax was to look at the “cold weather”; that shows there was no global warming. Imagine that! Cold weather in winter! Genius!

Rather than go into more idiotic arguments they had, I asked if they knew what happened when the air warmed, especially air above the Arctic. They looked at each other and said that the snow would melt…but that wasn’t happening, they said. And the pictures of the receding ice in the north and the glaciers in Antarctica were photo shopped and that was just propaganda. Wow! I was impressed!

When I asked them what happens when a mass of air is heated they decided it rises. Good for them. They actually got one right. So then, what happens to that air when it rises? Well, they thought and said it moves. Right again, guys, and when that air moves what happens to the other air around it? Something has to move in to take its place and that causes “wind.” That wind can move pretty fast, right, guys? They agreed. And when that other wind moves, what happens? Well, it takes air from other places. Right again! This was remarkable! Air starts moving all around because some air is heated.

So if that air moves that much, what happens to the weather where the air was? This was tougher. I told them that didn’t it seem logical that the stuff that moved had to be replaced by “other air?” Yeah. And when that other air moves doesn’t it set in motion other air, from other places; cold and hot places; mountains and deserts? Yeah.

So if a large amount of air is heated, rises and moves away and other air has to take its place, tell me about the other air. Is it warm? Not necessarily. Is it cold? Actually it is. When air moves, it cools. This confused them. So I told them to use the analogy of a fire at their hunting camp. It’s nice by the fire but doesn’t the air rushing into the fire and going “up” pull colder air in? Isn't that why your backs get cold but your front is nice and toasty? And don't you have to keep turning around to get warm all over?Well, yeah. Now do you see how air that was artificially warmed can cause changes in the weather? Not quite, they said.

After pulling some hair from my head, I continued. If it’s hotter over the northeast and the air moves and other air takes its place what happens? Oh! Different weather moves in from everywhere. And because it’s winter, that air from the north is colder, right? I didn’t want to go into too much discussion about moisture in the air from the warm waters of the south and how as it cooled (because it's winter and the sun is lower and thus provides less direct radiative heat) would help the air move faster and bring rain that would turn to snow up north.

I told them the same thing happens in the summer only in reverse. Hot air rises faster and pulls in more air. Because the sun is higher in the sky, the southern U.S. is warmer and that air is pulled north making it hotter here. And the hotter it gets, the more air rises and pulls more air from the hot south and we get hotter. Just the opposite of winter.
I could see a glimmer of understanding. It went on for a while. I explained how the air patterns could change the circulation all over the world because of heated air over other cities and countries.

I explained how the chemicals in the air trapped sunlight and therefore increased heat which caused the air to rise starting the process over and over. And if we dumped more chemicals into the air, the air would trap more heat and so on.

Then I really got them going when I explained how the changes in water temperature of the oceans could cause warmer or cooler air over the water and how it would affect that mass of air. It was becoming clearer to them.

The discussion went on for quite some time and they really appeared interested. However, they still clung to the notion that what they heard on TV was true. After all, why would TV (and Fox) lie? More hair removed! I gave them some sites to view and told them to just read the information with an open mind (right!) I then told them that it wasn’t “global warming” meaning everything would get hotter, but instead the warming caused the changes in weather patterns all over the earth, air and water circulation and that affected climate; that it was really “climate change.” Oh! They could understand “climate change”, but not what caused it. Now they had a better understanding of the reasons for the changes.

I told them lastly to listen the next time someone tells them it’s all a hoax. Did the person on Fox provide names, references or facts or just make unsubstantiated statements? Then I told them when they heard “scientists” talking about it to listen closely because those scientists would provide information these two could really check on.

It seemed I made some headway. They both agreed to look into the matter with a little less cynicism. Both told me they had never had it explained to them how this climate thing worked; they just accepted the comments made on Fox, which were offered without proof.
Maybe I helped in some way to quash some of the corporate bull that Fox has spewed. Maybe I instilled a bit of questioning in them so they don’t blindly accept everything anyone says, including me. I told them to get facts from other places and decide for themselves rather than just believing what they hear on TV. Baby steps.

Now, if they just would learn about how corporations and Republicans are using them to make the wealthy even richer… and as I walked away, I heard them discussing who was on WWE that night! Maybe it's not ALL Fox's fault!

Well, one thing at a time.

Meet the Stupids

Oh, the irony:

Yet another study has been released proving that watching Fox News is detrimental to your intelligence. World Public Opinion, a project managed by the Program on International Policy Attitudes at the University of Maryland, conducted a survey of American voters that shows that Fox News viewers are significantly more misinformed than consumers of news from other sources. What’s more, the study shows that greater exposure to Fox News increases misinformation.

Here at C&L, that study is greeted with a big "Duh!". When I was Managing Editor of the site, I had to take periodic breaks from monitoring Fox News because I could feel my brain turning into sludge from the nonstop campaign of propaganda, half-truths, flat-out lies and ugliness that passes for Fox News content. I fear for David Neiwert now, especially since he takes it upon himself to take apart Glenn Beck's lunacy day after day. I'm completely serious when I say that it took a toll on my health to subject myself to Fox's toxicity. I'd hate to see Dave go through the same health issues I have.

But there are those who clearly thrive on a diet of non-informational crap.

In eight of the nine questions below, Fox News placed first in the percentage of those who were misinformed (they placed second in the question on TARP). That’s a pretty high batting average for journalistic fraud. Here is a list of what Fox News viewers believe that just ain't so:

• 91 percent believe the stimulus legislation lost jobs
• 72 percent believe the health reform law will increase the deficit
• 72 percent believe the economy is getting worse
• 60 percent believe climate change is not occurring
• 49 percent believe income taxes have gone up
• 63 percent believe the stimulus legislation did not include any tax cuts
• 56 percent believe Obama initiated the GM/Chrysler bailout
• 38 percent believe that most Republicans opposed TARP
• 63 percent believe Obama was not born in the U.S. (or that it is unclear)

The conclusion is inescapable. Fox News is deliberately misinforming its viewers and it is doing so for a reason. Every issue above is one in which the Republican Party had a vested interest. The GOP benefited from the ignorance that Fox News helped to proliferate.

Yes, the people who get their news from Fox are stupid. But Booman wonders if it's a chicken-or-egg scenario: do people get stupid from Fox or do stupid people gravitate to Fox?

I'd like to see a controlled experiment where they let one group of people self-select which cable news network they watch and another group is assigned randomly. Then we can see if the stupid people are choosing Fox News and being made more stupid, or if Fox News can draw in mentally competent people and turn them into drooling buffoons who think Charles Krauthammer isn't a deluded crackpot but a sage patriot and overall mensch.

Frankly, I think it's both. Almost every stupid, misinformed person I know is a Fox News viewer...and every single one of them gets even dumber each year.

This is absurd! And any Democrat who agrees with Obama on this should be ousted immediately, including our Quisling Jason Altmire. In case you didn't know, he favors dumping social security in favor of letting you invest - and lose - your money in the Stock Market, just like so many millions did in 2008. And just because the market is back up, the money you lost is STILL gone and you have to start over with nothing! Do you have enough time for that?

Call this Bluedog Democrat now and tell him that he can not support anything that could kill social security.

By the way, while you seniors didn't get a Cost of Living increase this year because Obama and the Republicans and many Democrats spent too much of your money in Afghanistan, remember that THEY got a 1% raise. 1%! Big deal you say? They make $174,000 a year. They get $1740 extra dollars per year of your money and you get nothing. The average social security payment is around $1000 per month. 1% of that is ten lousy bucks, $120 per year - and it's taxable (Jason can invest that extra money to make more since he doesn't worry about where his next meal is coming from)! And you're supposed to live on that while he and they get one hundred seventy four times as much as you? is it because they and their families are more important than you and yours?

If you think that way, don't ever complain again.

Call the guy at this number: 724- 226- 1304

and tell him not to touch social security, which, by the way does NOT IN ANY WAY AFFECT THE DEFICIT. So if you hear that, you're being lied to. Social Security is solvent through 2037 and even then, if nothing is done,benefits will reduce by less than 20%. Do you think your investment can stand losing everything again in another Wall Street Criminal Action?

You want a solution? There's a simple one but the President and Congress don't want to use it because they want their buddies on Wall Street to get richer. All that's needed is to increase the social security cap from $106,000 and make the rich pay their fair share. The CBO (Congressional Budget Office, a TOTALLY NON-PARTISAN DEPARTMENT) has determined that that simple fact will insure social security until 2075! But you won't hear anything about that from Altmire or the media.

When you call, ask him about that. If he gives you ANY excuse or run-around that it won't work, ask him why he disagrees with the CBO and economic experts, you know, the ones who do these things for a living...rather than cater to the whims of Altmire's 3% wealthy in his district!

Call 724- 226-1304!

It's YOUR MONEY FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE he's giving away!

Here's the reason the bill shouldn't pass!

The innocent-sounding payroll tax holiday, on the other hand, will lead inexorably to killing Social Security. Let me explain:

Sixty members of the Senate are unwilling to raise taxes by 3 percent on the $250,000 and first dollar (and all those dollars earned above $250.001) of those making over $250,000 and by 1.6 percent more (for a total of 4.6 percent) on the $384,860 and first dollar {and all those dollars earned above $384,861) of those making over $384,860. They are even unwilling to spare everyone making less that one million dollars any increased taxes and simply raise taxes by 4.6 percent on the $1 million and first dollar (and all those dollars earned above $1,000,001 of the nation’s multimillionaires and billionaires. (I say multimillionaires because anyone with a net worth of a few million dollars is not making an annual income of over one million dollars.)

Given that unwillingness to raise taxes by less than a nickel on every dollar earned over $1 million, I find it unfathomable that a more conservative Congress, in two years, in an election year, will increase the payroll tax by 2 percent on the very first dollar, and every other dollar up to the cap, earned by virtually every single worker in the country. Consequently, I think we have to assume that the payroll tax holiday will be extended beyond the two years the president is proposing and quite likely could become permanent....

A permanent two percent cut in Social Security contributions doubles the 75 year projected shortfall.... The pressure to cut Social Security in a slow, gradual way for younger workers will be enormous. Progressives will not want to cut benefits for the low-income – and they shouldn’t be cut; they should be increased. Despite the fact that there are few beneficiaries who do not desperately need their Social Security – 2/3rds of the elderly and 70 percent of people receiving disability benefits rely on Social Security for half or more of their income and most people think even more people will be dependent on it in the future – nonetheless, means-testing Social Security will become a viable option.... Changing the benefit formula in the manner proposed by a majority of the Catfood Commission, will appear attractive, even though it would gradually and inexorably eviscerate the benefits of the middle class, and with it, their support for the program.